How to Not Suck at Meditation
Meditation is good for so many things.
It can reduce your blood pressure, reduce tension, and give you time to just sit and be in a world that constantly demands your attention and productivity.
And who doesn’t need a little dose of peace and quiet?
But to nobody’s surprise, it can be frustrating to practice meditation when you have a busy mind.
The funny thing is, quieting a busy mind is something meditation can help with.
In fact, it’s kind of the whole point: Get quiet, find stillness, and give your brain and body a chance to relax and recenter.
Reasons Why You Might Feel Frustrated when Trying to Meditate
There are of course many reasons why people find meditation to be frustrating.
Here’s a list of the few most common and ideas for ways to address each.
Your Posture Feels Wildly Uncomfortable
Our lifestyles today require very little physical activity in order to meet our needs.
We have cars or public transportation to take us from place to place like the grocery store or work and unless we have a regular exercise routine (tell me your ways!), our posture can easily crumble to mush.
It’s normal to feel uncomfortable when attempting to sit still, especially for an extended period of time.
Try to find ways to make yourself comfortable when settling in to meditate so you have one less thing pulling your mind away from the present moment.
You don’t have to sit on the floor cross-legged just because this is what you think you “should” be doing.
Try sitting on a bolster, couch cushion, or a folded up blanket. You might also adjust your hand placement to find a comfortable spot, like resting your hands in your lap or placing a hand on each knee with palms facing up or grounded down with the palms of your hands gently hugging your knee caps.
Find what works best for you and roll with it!
You Find it Hard to “Empty Your Mind”
First, who doesn’t?
Second, there is a popular belief that meditation is about “emptying” or “quieting” your mind, but here’s the thing, your brain is always in search of something to do, so thoughts will enter your mind when you sit and try to do nothing but breathe.
Meditation is more about acknowledging each thought as it comes, then allowing it to float on past and not focusing or dwelling on it.
It may help to envision your thoughts as clouds rolling by and exhale slowly as if this breath is the wind that blows the clouds gently on their way.
If you find that you have things pop into your mind that you are clinging to because you want to remember or address them later, you might try keeping a notebook open next to you and jot things down then feel better able to let them go from your immediate awareness.
Our goal is not perfection, our goal is building the habit of quiet.
With each time you sit to practice meditation, you may find that your mind feels quieter than the last and the scribbles in your notebook are fewer than before.
You Feel Like Time is Dragging On
It’s normal to feel like time is dragging on when you try to meditate.
We have so much ability to cram every waking moment with something to do that when we are intentionally not doing things, it can feel unnatural and downright unnerving.
But you deserve rest and quiet.
Try giving yourself time to push through the discomfort of sitting still to send the message to your brain and body that “We are doing this, whether you like it or not!”
Start by setting a timer for five minutes, then seven minutes, then 10 minutes until you find your happy spot.
Easing into it is a great way to start developing a practice without feeling like your brain is on fire.
You Can’t Find Peace and Quiet in Your Space
Some days you might fall easily into quiet time and other days you might feel antsy as ever.
Try setting up your time and space to be as relaxing as possible (even if it’s imperfect).
Consider putting on soft music to drown out the neighbor’s dog barking, use essential oils to bring your attention to a nice smell, place a folded blanket over your lap, or turn on soft lighting and let the background of your space fade away.
If you keep the same routine each time, or close to it, your brain and body will become more acclimated and you will find it easier each time to drop in and relax.
Guided meditations can also be a great resource if you find it hard to sit in silence or are constantly distracted by your own thoughts.
Yoga with Adriene is a YouTube channel by Adriene Mishler who hosts endless beautiful yoga classes and guided meditations that you can try for free.
Meditation is What You Make it
In the end, meditation is what you make it.
It’s important to remember that ascribing to someone else’s rules or ideals for meditation when it just doesn’t fit your lifestyle or attention span will only keep you feeling defeated.
Meditation is simply finding the time in a busy and loud world to sit and reconnect with yourself, recenter, and realign with the life you want to be living.
There are no rules except to show up for yourself in whatever way best serves you, and breathe in and out.
Yours in practiced quiet,
Emily Rose // Miss Magnolia
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